storytellers

GeneralArnold77 · Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 1:42 am Post subject: Hope In Hand & Strength of Heart

Hope in Hand
&
Strength of Heart

Dreams are curious things. Some consider them to be foreshadowing of the future, or messages from the past. I however, think that they are messages, and images of the human soul, of what our deeds, whether good or evil, have brought to the world. This may not be shown in the conventional way, but in a metaphorical way. The messages may be sent by way of images of a completely different world, one that was made by only human goodness, or human evil.

As my dream comes, whatever I was thinking of seems to darken, and eventually fade into the distance. I soon find myself standing in the middle of the most barren, dark landscape one can imagine. As I look ahead, I see nothing but a dirt brown trail, littered with rocks and fragments of trees. Above me is not a blue sky, or even the clear night sky lit dimly by the bright stars, but a black emptiness, with bits of red, where thunder rumbles from, and lightning flashes. Behind me lies one thing, a large black fortress. I wonder, what lies in that fortress, as I begin to approach it.

I hear a gut wrenching scream, once I reach the entrance, as if someone were being tortured for all eternity. Then I realize, it's me. It's my own soul. My soul is what's being tormented, and tortured in the deep dungeons of these horrific ramparts. At the top of the keep is a red light, a light that pierces stone, metal, bone, and flesh, and the light is focused on me. I can not get away from it. It follows me, haunting me no matter how far away from this evil tower I go.

I progress along this barren trail, only to find it leads into a dark jungle. I find myself frightened, but yet at the same time, I have a sense of belonging, as if to say that I belong in this dark corner of the universe. There is a faint popping in the distance, and I venture further to discover what this noise is.

It is the sounds of war. The sounds of men screaming in agony as their frail forms are struck by bullets, and shrapnel. The first person I encounter is a field surgeon. He has a man on his operating table. The man is badly wounded, his leg pours blood out of it, and as I near the hospital area the cries of the wounded become louder, and clearer. It is clear to me now, beyond a shadow of a doubt, though this forsaken land is full of shadows and memory, that it is my name they cry out, for it is my wrong doings in life that have wounded them. As I look at them, I realize that they have no faces, that they could be any one of the many that I have hurt in my life. I decide to continue my travels further into the deep jungle that has brought about so much suffering and pain. I happen to glance up for a moment and catch the view of a blue sky above the peaks of the mountains. It is the lands beyond, and my intuition tells me that it must be a land of peace and comfort, for how can this entire world be pain, torture, and death? I must reach that light! I must reach the world outside, and escape this eternal hell I have been cast into.

As I advance, I see a shining cliff. It is made of soft white marble, and at the top is a white castle topped with a gold pinnacle. I realize that to get to it I must climb these sharp cliff faces, and escape what I've come to realize are evils of my own makings and the great red light watching, watching, from the black fortress, where my soul is held a prisoner by my own dark memories.

I begin the climb. A climb that feels like it will last forever! Will I never reach the land where darkness ends, and care and companionship are the ideals which the land may be built on, instead of dark memories, and evil deeds long done? I reach a flat, and I realize that I must get through a cave to continue the climb, for there is no way around it. I enter with nothing, no light, or ability for vision at all.

It is a dark cave. A cold feeling descends over my exhausted body. The air is damp and rank with the stench of rotting corpses. As I continue, I stumble across a dead body. At first sight I dismiss it as a mere casualty of the hellish war raging at the bottom of the mountain. A closer examination brought to my mind that it was a soldier from the war, but no bullet, or bayonet, ended this poor creature's life. It was something worse. Something utterly evil, and erie. The ultimate darkness, come from the deepest pits of my mind. A creature known as love. Not love as we think of parents loving their children, but the kind of love that is evil, and causes men to drive themselves crazy for something they can never have, or experience, but continue to strive for it regardless of the cost.

I realize this creature inhabits this cave, but I have no choice but to continue. This new awareness of a dark memory lurking in the shadows heightens my senses as I continue my dark journey. Finally it appears. It is a dark creature, large, and completely evil, a true creature from the deepest caves of my subconscious mind, a creature created from the most evil deed a man can commit. It's eyes are a hazel brown, it's six limbs are long, and it's abdomen large, full of stinging poison, the poison spoken by my own tongue while creating this beast, and it's long sharp fangs, longing to plunge themselves into my flesh. I must run, for what have I to defend myself with? I stumble across another body and fall into a sickly web. It is a web of lies, my lies. But in this web, I uncover a weapon, the very weapon I used to wage this war, I may now use to free myself from it's product.

I continue to run. The weapon glows as it feels my heart pounding. The first words that I have whispered in this dark land, come forth as I become trapped in the biggest web, in the creatures lair; "What have I done?" I start to slash myself free, my voice getting ever louder, and ever more frantic. "What have I done? Dear god help me! I was foolish, I realize it now!" The creature begins to back away, as my weapon begins to cut through the strands of the web, easier than it did before. I fall to the ground, dropping the weapon that has aided me thus far.

As I rise I find another, it would appear simple to most, a mere sword, but as I read the inscription I realize that this is no mere sword, but the true weapon of my salvation from this dark terror, that still lurks somewhere in the damp shadows. I read the inscription aloud.

Call me Hope,
For it is I who will see you past all dangers

And so with Hope in hand and strength of heart I continued through the dark cave. Though the more dead I saw the more Hope began to fade. It's color beginning to dim in the caves darkness. "Dear God what have I done?" are the only words that continue to pass my lips, more quietly now, as I continue out to the outside of the cave.

There is a set of stairs in front of me, and the bright sunlight seems nearer now, than ever before. The castle, more brilliant and much more inviting. Foolishly I rush forward only to be confronted by the demon once more. "Please may god forgive me for this awful hell I have created!" A raspy yet soft feminine voice, that can be nothing but pure evil, responds to my seemingly innocent prayer: "God can not forgive those who can not forgive themselves." I realize now, with utter clarity, that it is the creature who has spoke those words for at once it's long stinger, injects my own poisonous words back into my being, leaving me so stunned by the evil that has been spread by my very own self.

I am left, where I began, at the base of the dark fortress, wet, cold, and with ever the lingering questions:

How can one person cause all this pain?
How can one person be responsible for so much suffering?
How can one be the bearer of all these evils?
How can one go through this hell forever, alone?
How can one forgive themselves for a crime, before the victims of the crimes forgive them?
How can one..... be?

Then I feel a weight in my hand, I look down, and realize that through all this Hope remains, and with Hope a man can carry on, no matter how dark the outcome may appear.

Call me hope,
For it is I who will see you past all dangers

eleison · Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:00 am Post subject:

Small errors I picked up along the way:

I hear a gut wrenching scream, once I reach the entrance,
You don't need that comma

Then I realize, it's me.
The tenses in this line, and a few others, bugs me. My brain wants it to be "Then I realized, it was me.

You know what? I sort of want this all to be in the past tense. I get this otherworldly dream feel from it but the tense you are using sort of takes away. (If that makes any sense.)

Don't get me wrong, the work is interesting and I am looking forward to more of your work... it's just a little detail of it that is not working for me. Be sure to hear what others say before taking my word for it... I may just be a freak of nature.
_________________
Everywhere I go I find that a poet has been there before me.
~Sigmund Freud~

Thalya · Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2008 3:34 pm Post subject:

I really like this, lots of detail always draws me in and you definitely did that. The descriptions really help define the dreamy atmosphere. Nice work!

GeneralArnold77 · Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 5:58 am Post subject:

Thanks to a reply to my question in the "Suggestions" board, I have desided to pose the question:

There is more to this story, would people be ok with reading more than two or three pages were I to post it, or should I just keep posting a couple of pages at a time?